Research Shows Dad Makes A Difference! Part 2

Posted on November 18, 2008 
Filed Under Fathering, Life, Parenting

I think most of us realize intuitively that there is an emotional bonding that usually occurs between a parent and child. The normal interactions of life tend to make that child want to “attach” emotionally to the parent.

Dad, when you spend time with your little one, you facilitate that process of bonding. It can be as simple as playing peek-a-boo! Researchers suggest when a father plays games with his toddler he is developing a secure attachment within that child. And you may be surprised at the ways that can help your child.

A primary benefit of a good bond between dads and their kids was discovered when researchers observed that toddlers who are securely attached to fathers are better at solving problems later in life (see “Parenting Characteristics,” Child Development 55 [1984]: 740-52Source: M. Esterbrooks and Wendy A. Goldberg, “Toddler Development in the Family: Impact of Father Involvement and Parenting Characteristics,” Child Development 55 [1984]: 740-52). Who’d have guessed that some good games of peek-a-boo can help a child become a better problem-solver as an adult?!

Also, Dad, did you know you’ll shape your child’s eating habits? A study reported in Applied Nursing Research  (Volume 18, Issue 2, Pages 106–109, M . A. Horodynski , M . Arndt) suggested that fathers influence mealtime behaviors and a child’s food preferences. I wonder how many of us like broccoli or perhaps don’t like to rush through our meals because we saw our dad exhibit those traits? This isn’t something we picked up in the drive-through line, though. These are things caught through regular mealtime interaction. Takes spending dinner together on a frequent basis.

Finally, Dad, you want to have some fun with your child. I remember gently (okay, not so gently, sometimes) lifting our kids up in the air, chasing them around the house, enjoying a rousing game of hide-and-seek, and when they got old enough, wrestling a little with them. It was great fun. It was not the kind of play that Mom typically engaged in with them. In fact, sometimes I was admonished by mothers (not my wife, but other women) to be careful and “don’t hurt them.” Lo and behold, what came to me intuitively – a more aggressive style of play interaction — was something that researchers indicate is needed for kids to develop well. Without that type of physical play, a child lags in certain physiological development. So, go rough-house a bit with those young ‘ens!

All this to show that what an engaged, active dad does instinctively with his younger child is beneficial to that little one, in the short term and longer. It takes time, of course, to play games and become a major influence in your child’s life. But do it, Dad, do it. Set aside the distractions of work and sports and hobbies, especially when they are young. And be a good father. You’re the only one that boy or girl has.

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