Advice For New Parents: Ice Cream

At the time we were expecting our first child, Dena and I were volunteering with the college group at church. The “kids” threw a baby shower for us, and a cherished gift, which I still have, was a small notebook with suggestions for being good parents. It has some priceless perspectives for new parents!

Over the next weeks I’ll share some of the golden nuggets of advice from these scholars. Here’s the first installment.

My advice to you is to make sure you feed your new baby ice cream whenever the opportunity arises.

“Why,” you might ask? Well, when I was little my mother would treat my brother, sister and me to Dairy Queen after our Saturday morning swim lessons. The problem was that I was too young at the time to realize that my mom only ordered an empty cone for me – no ice cream! As I matured, I finally realized what I was missing, and boy did I get angry! I’m not sure I can ever forgive my mother for that.

So if you think your baby will never know — beware! One day he will find out. He will grow up wondering what else he missed out on.

‘Tis better to have a fat baby than a bitter baby.

Let your baby indulge in ice cream!

It took many years, but I think Dena and I are starting to see the wisdom in this advice. In fact, we just had ice cream yesterday. Trying to make up for lost time…

Kids and The Stress of Life

I hate school! I don’t want to go to school!

That’s what he said, and my calm reply was, in essence, “Too bad.” I explained that it is my rule, and a state law, that he has to go to school. We all have things we don’t like, and usually we have to just do those. Same for school.

A day or two later, he got out of school. Well, for a day. He was suspended. I won’t go into the details here, but let’s say that these are not the usual challenges parents of a first-grade student have to deal with. He figured out how to get out of school. Good for him! In this regard he is an over-achiever!

While difficult, we do smile at the boy’s persistence. He is, if nothing else, creative and determined. Now, to challenge that energy into something more…productive. Whew!

Related to the broad spectrum of parenting challenges, I saw this article about younger children who wrestle with going to school. Now, this woman’s child isn’t as trying as our son, but still, it seems many kids are struggling with life? Even something as constant and enduring as school?

Are YOUR kids stressed out?

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Parenting Tips That Annoy

Have you ever heard something like this from well-meaning friends or family members? Or maybe just the elderly neighbor?

“Why are you bringing your child outside when it’s so cold out?”

Or,

“I think your baby’s hungry.”

These seemingly innocent interventions by other folks can bring on a lot of guilt for a new parent. What’s a mom or dad to do when someone tries to “help?”

Here’s an article with 10 annoying parenting tips, and I thought some of this was quite funny. If you’ve had such “helpful advice” foisted upon you, I wonder how you reacted? And, based on your experiences, what can a young parent do to politely thank that wise stranger at the grocery store and quickly move on?


Do We Really Need This?

Internet in the bathroom – via a high-tech mirror? Can’t we escape the web somewhere…somehow?

Power of Radio

Here’s a recent comment about the was God can significantly use a radio program to touch a life:

“Back in the mid-90s, I was in my home office working on the computer and listening to music when my one-year-old son crawled into the room. He went straight to the radio, spun the tuning knob several times, and then left. He ‘just so happened’ to tune in to a Christian station that was airing a program unfamiliar to me – the Focus on the Family daily broadcast. To make a long story short, I’ve been listening to your show for the past fifteen years and have supported your ministry during that time. Most importantly, though, I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior, due in large part to your programs! I’m still amazed that God used a toddler’s tiny hand to set into motion the events that would eventually lead to my salvation!”

I love being able to work on this broadcast, which goes around the world and can be a life-changer!

Birth Order Insights

This week I had the privilege of recording some programs with Dr. Kevin Leman. He is an insightful, highly engaging and humorous friend to have in the studio! While we didn’t talk about the topic directly, one of his “specialties” is addressing birth order and how that affects us – and our families.

I think it is pretty amusing to hear Dr. Leman talk to someone about their place in the birth order, and then go on to describe their personality and sometimes even specific characteristics of their mate! In fact, he shared with me that recently he was chatting with someone at an event, and Dr. Leman told the fellow that – just from their conversation – he had determined the man is a first-born, married to a last-born. And he was right!

Here’s a blog entry at the Wall Street Journal about birth order and marriage in which Dr. Leman is cited. Check it out – and be sure to see some of the reader comments, too.

If you’d like to learn more, watch this video of Dr. Leman talking generally about birth order; get his newly updated classic about the subject; order his book, First Born Advantage (which is on sale for a very good price); or go to his official website.

Healed!

Our youngest stepped on a nail the other day. He poked his foot pretty good, although not deeply. And for a day he hopped around the house on one foot. It was pretty noisy – we have hardwood floors, and while he isn’t a very big kid, Zane’s hopping sounded like a marching band was going through the place. He was pretty cute as he made his way from the bedroom to the living room. (And yes, we made sure he is up-to-date on shots.)

Anyway, he started getting better yesterday, and after church took his shoes and sock off. When he did that, the plastic bandage came off, too. He notices these things. He looked intently at his foot and then, looking at his sister standing nearby, said, “I think the Holy Spirit made my foot stop bleeding.”

He repeated that diagnosis to me a few minutes later, and all I could say was, “You are probably right, buddy.” Who am I to argue with him?

As I smiled at Zane’s faith in God’s ability to heal his sore foot, I thought about the innocence and truly child-like quality of his statement. We read a lot of Bible stories to him, and while those are important for Zane to hear and to know, it was mighty pleasing to see that he is internalizing those, and that he related God’s ability to heal with today, with his own need. In his mind, his foot is better, so it must have been God’s healing hand at work.

I also thought about the more adult, sophisticated response to illness and injury – even in Christian circles. I’ll admit that I tend to ascribe physical improvements to medicine or the physical therapist. When I have a headache, I do occasionally pray about it, but I more often grab some pain reliever. And when I get better, I don’t usually attribute my healed wounds and hurts directly to the Holy Spirit.

But maybe I’ll start doing that.

Someone Is Right

In today’s world of tolerance and relativity, many are afraid of offending others by suggesting there are absolutes. Statements like, “I’m right, and you are wrong,” are rarely uttered anymore. That seems so…oddly arrogant or misguided. But we don’t have to shy away from Truth; indeed, we are called by Christ to be light and salt – and there’s no middle ground.

Here’s one person who isn’t afraid to declare Truth, and he boldly suggests that, in today’s world, we can’t both be right. This is one engaging conversation!

Entering The World With A Bit of Flair

While I can brag a bit that I helped deliver our third daughter at home – unexpectedly – I don’t think that story tops this one. And in response, that was a smart move by the airline, I’d say!

Most of the time, babies enter the world with less drama. I wonder, though, if you have – or know of – an unusual story about the labor and delivery process?

Sexuality in Marriage

Last month we aired a message by Dr. Juli Slattery on Focus on the Family. It has generated a lot of response, and you’ll hear why when you give it a listen! Her presentation, to a large group of women, was all about sexuality. Dr. Slattery was frank – and funny. Her audience loved the unique things she shared.

Related, the Wall Street Journal noted a recent study that indicated couples who share housework often share…more than that! In marriages where the husband does some of the cleaning around the home, sexual intimacy is more frequent. What do you think – true or not?

Finally, I’m thinking back about 25 years ago, when my wife and I read this book. Great stuff there! We laughed a lot, and we learned a lot, too. I’ve been recommending it to couples ever since.

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