Parenthood and Autism
Posted on March 15, 2010
Filed Under Focus on the Family, Marriage, Parenting, Physical Health | Leave a Comment
I just read a blog post about the new NBC television series, Parenthood. The writer deals specifically with one of the show’s story lines, about one couple who learn their child has Aspergers, a condition that is one of many Autistic Spectrum Disorders (ASD). While I’ve not seen the show, evidently its portrayal of the condition and its effects on a family is rather accurate and very compelling.
As the father of a boy with autism, I’m intrigued. I know firsthand about the difficulties and challenges of parenting such a child, and also about the stress that journey can have on a marriage. So I’d like to know more: I wonder if you saw the television program and have any reaction? Let me know.
And if you need some starting points to learn more about ASD, Focus on the Family has some links here, and I’d also (humbly) suggest this audio conversation I had with Bob West, founder of Need Project, about my family’s situation.
Love Your Wife
Posted on March 9, 2010
Filed Under Marriage, Spiritual Life | 1 Comment
“Live with your wives in an understanding way…” I Peter 3:7
A good buddy of mine is a smooth operator. He designed matching wedding rings, makes his wife photo collages; he’s “that guy” from the famous diamond campaign. Recently, I suggested he should give the rest of us knuckleheads some lessons.
His wife piped up and said, “Do you know what my husband does? Almost every night, he sits on the bathroom floor while I’m brushing my teeth and talks to me. He tells me about his day. He asks me about my day. By the time we get to bed, he’s talked with me for at least an hour.”
The conversation immediately moved past good-natured ribbing. I remembered that two years ago my friend had shared that their bed time routine was a point of contention in his marriage. He got ready for bed much faster than his wife; couldn’t figure out what took her so long. Most of the time, he’d be asleep well before she was even out of the bathroom. Frustrating. Somewhere along the way, he set aside his pride and chose to recognize this as an opportunity to serve. Sacrificing some sleep, he now sits on the floor while she brushes her teeth. He connects with her; her life, her thoughts, her day.
I Peter 3:7 exhorts husbands to “live with your wives in an understanding way.” What does that verse really mean? What does that look like? Poetry, pictures, and romance are nice, but Peter was probably talking about gifts of a different kind, like sacrifice and service. He was probably talking about getting out of bed, sitting on the floor, and connecting with our brides.
Realizing my buddy had turned a struggle in his marriage into a strength made me more convinced he should be giving lessons. Then I wondered, who would be open to learning from him? How many men are willing to get out of bed and sit on the bathroom floor to make their wife feel special? Am I? Are you? If not, then don’t claim I Peter 3:7. If you are, then get ready to do whatever it takes.
This is not about cookie-cutter solutions. Prepare to serve and, over time, get ready for God to turn struggle in your marriage into strength. But, be careful…sitting on the bathroom floor might change your bed time routine more than you think.
(With gratitude to my friend Trace, who shared this powerful example with me)
Now That The Oscars Are Over
Posted on March 8, 2010
Filed Under Media | Leave a Comment
The Best Picture award went to a war film, and the epic by James Cameron was only a runner up. The Oscars provided a bit of drama for the audience gathered in L.A. It was a surprising night for many film enthusiasts, including our own Plugged In team. Read their live blog account and see Paul and Steve’s reactions to the ceremony. And before you try to see The Hurt Locker, go here for a trustworthy review by Plugged In.
Your Vote For “Best Picture?”
Posted on March 5, 2010
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There’s a lot of excitement about this weekend’s Oscars. The movie-going public is seemingly enthralled about Avatar and The Hurt Locker and The Blind Side. While the Academy has expanded the entries to ten for the Best Picture category, I’m sorry to say I’ve only seen one of the possible winners, the Pixar-produced, “Up.” Truth is, I just don’t have a lot of time go to movies, even though I enjoy the art and impact of film.
So, of the ten films nominated for Best Picture, what is your favorite (and note, please, that neither Focus nor I are endorsing any of these films…just learning what you like)?
Loading ...What Do You Recommend?
Posted on March 3, 2010
Filed Under Fathering, Focus on the Family, Parenting | 1 Comment
Sitting in a conversation with Rob Kirkpatrick, the Executive Producer for our daily Focus radio program, we talked about parenting. We touched on several key resources and perspectives about child-rearing that we naturally rely on, day in and day out. For me, those include Dr. Dobson’s classic, New Strong Willed Child. And Dr. Kevin Leman’s book about the role of birth order in how children behave. And then there’s Dr. Gary Chapman’s book, Five Love Languages. And if I took a few more minutes, I could probably list several more books and videos that have been essential for me to use and apply as a parent.
I’m wondering what resources YOU might suggest to people - over and over again - as you go through the parenting journey? Give me a list of your favorite items - and some links, too.
A New Day!
Posted on March 1, 2010
Filed Under Focus on the Family, Focus on the Family Broadcast, Personal, Spiritual Life | Leave a Comment
Today marks the first day at Focus on the Family without our founder, Dr. James Dobson, who has faithfully completed the task he set out to do more than seven years ago: step away from the ministry he started and has loved for 33 years. In so doing, Dr. Dobson has done a rare thing.
Few leaders willingly let go of the helm, few make room for a new generation of leaders to step up, few fully depart and allow the organization to grow in new and different ways. Dr. Dobson has done this, though, and we owe him our heartfelt thanks.
Those of us staying at Focus are so grateful for the heritage and legacy Dr. Dobson leaves. We’re also quite confident in the coming days — and that’s not a confidence in ourselves; rather, we’re confident in the God who formed this ministry and continues to have His hand on the work, touching lives worldwide through our humble efforts.
During the past year, I’ve reflected on the many lessons God has given us in the story of Joshua. Quickly summarizing, At the end of the Old Testament book of Exodus, Moses died Joshua stepped up to lead the millions of God’s people who were ready to cross the Jordan and enter the Promised Land. Turn the page, and you see in the opening verses of the book of Joshua a charge by God.
Joshua, be strong and courageous. Be strong and courageous, Joshua. Be strong and courageous. Joshua, be strong and courageous.
There’s no mistake in those verses. God repeated Himself to Joshua, the new leader, for a reason! There was much that could cause fear. There were unseen challenges and enemies. There would be difficulties with the people themselves, who would have doubt and whose hearts would stray. Yet, God had brought Joshua to this point, for “such a time as this” (to quote from the book of Esther). God knew all that had been done through Moses, He knew all that He had poured into Joshua, and He knew that the people were about to end 40 years of wandering to enter the Land He had promised their forefathers generations ago.
I don’t want to read too much into the parallels, but in many ways, Focus is now entering a new phase rather like that of the Israelites those centuries ago: without the faithful servant who brought us to this point. We’re entering a new season with a new leader and new challenges - and with many new opportunities ahead of us. There are sure to be hard and difficult things in store, but our God goes with us and in that we are convinced.
While we rejoice in the past miracles and wonders that God has accomplished through Focus on the Family to this point in time, we also look ahead, anxious to see how He will guide us in the coming years. We are confident because He assures us,
Be strong and courageous.
Our trust is in the Lord, we are confident of His charge to Jim Daly and to us as a staff, and we press ahead knowing God is in front, and He will accomplish His purposes through us if we will be humble, faithful and diligent.
This is not the end of the story for Focus on the Family. It may, in fact, be just the beginning! I hope you’ll stay with us as we charge ahead for the family.
Dr. Dobson’s Last Day
Posted on February 26, 2010
Filed Under Focus on the Family Broadcast | 1 Comment
As I noted yesterday, today marks the last day that Dr. Dobson is at Focus on the Family (read more here). And today’s broadcast is the final time Dr. Dobson is in studio while still at the ministry. Of course, he will be back with us to share with listeners about his new book, Bringing Up Girls, which is slated to be released in mid-April. Today, though, we’ll go back through the years — and also look ahead.
Earlier this week our broadcast staff gathered in “Studio A” for a private time with the Founder, going back over the years and memories we’ve enjoyed as we’ve worked for and with Dr. Dobson. This team knows him as well as any other part of the ministry might, probably better than most. Our working relationship with Dr. Dobson has involved numerous urgent, important projects…situations in which we had to hammer out a creative, excellent broadcast on a tight deadline with no room for error. That kind of “fire” forges strong friendships and enables a group of people to draw near to each other in ways that forced “team development” cannot. The room was full, and we could have talked for hours. As it was, we did have about an hour to reflect, think through some of the highlights, and laugh about some of the really humorous moments we’ve shared. It was a rich time, and we concluded with prayer, surrounding the man who brought most of us to the ministry, directly or indirectly (several on the radio team have been at Focus for more than 20 years). The tears caught up with several of us, and it was a gracious gift from God to have that opportunity for closure to an era.
Your Favorite Focus Broadcasts
Posted on February 25, 2010
Filed Under Fathering, Focus on the Family Broadcast | Leave a Comment
Looking back over the years…that’s what we’ve been doing this past week of programming. I’ve given some thought to a list of outstanding Focus on the Family broadcasts. Let me share a few of my favorite memories from the studio.
One is when we had the Barrett family sharing about the difficulties and challenges they experienced with a couple of their adopted children. Dr. Dobson was overcome with emotion as he described the awful pain and abuse those kids had seen prior to their adoptions. Then his eyes teared up, his voice cracked, and he simply had to stop the interview so he could compose himself.
That day confirmed what I already knew – that Dr. Dobson is a man with a big heart and great compassion, one who will stand up and fight for the neglected and abused. And that display of emotion made me appreciate and respect him all the more.
Then there was the day a former guest, Lindsey O’Conner, stopped by to give an update on her incredible story of giving birth to a daughter - while Lindsey was in a coma! Dr. Dobson spontaneously decided to record a program, and masterfully interviewed her, drawing out the way God worked in her family’s life. It was an outstanding conversation. He did that without any prep, and I was amazed at the ease with which he created that broadcast. It showed a wonderful instinct for stories and how to make compelling radio.
And one of the programs that spoke most powerfully to me was Dr. Dobson’s interview back in 2001 with Brandt Gustavson and Dr. Bill Bright. We called it, A Race To Heaven, and in that conversation he had me – and millions more – riveted to the radio for 30 minutes as he explored how those great men of God were approaching the end of their days here on earth. They shared so vividly about the God’s grace in their trials, their great joy in serving Christ, and their desire to see Him face to face. That inspiring exchange has – to this day – caused me to keep an eternal perspective on this life.
These are just a few of the standout programs I’ve enjoyed from the years that Dr. Dobson has hosted Focus on the Family.
What’s on your list of “must-listen” list of Focus broadcasts?
Dr. Dobson’s Final Days At Focus
Posted on February 25, 2010
Filed Under Focus on the Family, Focus on the Family Broadcast | Leave a Comment
It is hard to believe that we’re saying farewell to Dr. Dobson! Today and tomorrow are his last appearances on the daily radio broadcast which he began in 1977. While he will be back with us in April to talk about Bringing Up Girls, these two programs mark his last time in the studio while still at the ministry.
So, today Jim Daly, General Pat Caruana (FOF Board Chairman) and I interviewed Dr. Dobson (he was the guest!). There were tender moments, and also light-hearted reflections, during this fond look back — and look ahead. Good radio, and I hope you’ll listen in!
Final Programs With Dr. Dobson
Posted on February 22, 2010
Filed Under Focus on the Family, Focus on the Family Broadcast, Marriage, Spiritual Life | Leave a Comment
We’re entering what will surely be an emotional week, as Dr. James Dobson enters his final days at Focus on the Family. I’ve had the privilege of working here at Focus since 1991, when I came to help research and produce the broadcast. There have been many wonderful memories as I’ve served in the broadcast area here.
Often I am asked, “What’s Dr. Dobson really like?” I usually respond that, he is who he seems to be. There is nothing pretentious, there’s a consistency in his on-air and off-air personalities, and that he is - for the listener - who he seems to be on the radio. He is genuine, passionate, principled, caring, thoughtful, fiery and tender. He is a straight-shooter, and also has great diplomacy and tact. He looks out fo the Family, r the underdog, he fights for what he believes is right, he does not quit, he does not shrink back. He faithfully serves his God, his family, his friends. He is warm and engaging, and has a great sense of humor. He teases those who are close to him, too.
This week, as we wrap up our time with this extraordinary man, we’re naturally nostalgic as we reflect on the past 33 years of ministry by Dr. Dobson and his wife, Shirley. We’re also celebrating all that God has accomplished during more than three decades - particularly through the Focus on the Family radio program.
One of the recent broadcasts that touched me deeply featured former Focus president Don Hodel and his precious wife, Barbara. This couple has a fantastic relationship, in spite of - or perhaps because of? - some traumatic seasons. They’ve endured much, and their conversation with Dr. Dobson illustrates the heart of this ministry.
Today we’re hearing from Dr. Dobson himself, as he talked to our staff a few years back about something he called, “The Four Passions” (of Focus). If you want to better understand this man, and the ministry legacy he leaves for us to continue on with, listen in.
In coming programs, we’ll hear from listeners about the impact of Dr. Dobson and this ministry on their lives. There are some wonderfully touching moments!